I have a daughter in college who struggled in school every step of the way but she knows exactly what she wants for a career and she’s on that path.
I also have a daughter applying to colleges who has straight-A’s all through high school, but she has no idea what she wants to do in life and she’s struggling hard with even picking a college, much less a major, because of that.
I think we need to be open and flexible with our kids. One thing I’ve learned is that my kids aren’t me. They aren’t my wife. Both of us are hard-driven type-A personalities. That’s not my kids. At this age, we’ve taught them and raised them and now we are just trying to help and support going forward.
Given the number of highly educated, quietly miserable white collar professionals on this board all day, the tension of recognizing the privilege/opportunity of the situation and still not being happy with it should be very relatable. And the fact that both Randy and his parents recognized this tension made it honest and not overwrought. Are these first world problems? Sure, but that doesn’t change the pressures and conflicts you’re experiencing.
I thought the timing of the episode was great too. These last two years have massively impacted that day-to-day life of people in similar situations. So many folks are making similar decisions about what they want out of life outside of the linear path they’ve been on since high school.
I took the @djpie path with engineering and stuck to it because I do actually enjoy what I do. But I’ve seen my best friend on the exact opposite path. Has a degree, used it for maybe 6 months, and he never will use it again. At times I’ve gotten that cringe feeling too: the “make it easier on yourself and stop being indecisive” feeling. But I also know he would undoubtedly not be happy if that’s what he did. It took a couple of years but he then found a career path he truly enjoyed, and now he is looking to make a radical change again for work/life balance. This time I’m supporting/helping/searching instead of last time when I essentially was like figure it out man so you can pay me rent, just use your degree like you’re supposed to. I definitely get where you’re coming from because I’m the same way, I couldn’t do it and I’ve been there before where I couldn’t understand someone else doing it. But as you alluded to later, we all are very different.
Loved the episode guys, wonderful look into the life of Randy and just life in general. This season has been great.
Amen to this. I’m 39, have been at my current job for 4 years and was at the one before for 6 years. If you looked at my career arc from the outside I’d look like someone who “has it figured out” and had a great plan to get where I am.
Couldn’t be further from the truth. Throughout my 20s I was at a white collar stable job I hated and could have stayed at forever if I wanted. I took a total risk to join a consulting startup, then after 6 years (and getting acquired) I quit with nothing lined up. Total networking luck landed me where I am today, and while it’s a great company with good people, I constantly daydream of joining a new industry or making drastic changes or going independent or something. It’s a constant pull to do something more fulfilling or impactful or enjoyable.
I’m on the proverbial “normal” path and none of this happened until I was 29. Very very few people have it all figured out in their early/mid 20s.
Not saying anything that hasn’t already been said on here but MAN this episode typifies why NLU is the freaking best. An honest look into meandering journey that a lot of people go through, told on the backdrop of golf…just A+ stuff.
I know @Randy hates to have the spotlight on him but his honesty just draws you in.
Feels like you’re with buddies when you listen/watch their stuff and I just love it. Has absolutely made me love the game even more.
Really enjoyed the episode, major shoutout to the pro Dave. The golf business can be a really demanding and thankless job and it takes a special person to really go the distance in this industry. You can really tell he loves what he does and has just a great energy.
This whole conversation reminds me of a conversation I had with my wife yesterday. I have been offered a position at a new company and while discussing the pros and cons with my wife she said, “sometimes I think you just like change for the sake of change.” After thinking about that I agreed with her. There is absolutely nothing wrong with my current company or position, though I’ve been here for 5 years (with a 1.5 year break in the middle for flight school) and I’m just ready for a change. Some people are like that. I’ll never stay at a company for my entire career.
Watching this season specifically has provided such great insight into the boys. It takes guts to put yourself out there for the entire world to see and I am constantly in amazement to see the development of this group to push beyond just golf into life. Major props to the entire crew.
If anything, I am now more excited (and, honestly, more nervous) to meet the entire NLU crew at Bandon in April.
And I think our generation (I assume you’re somewhere near your 30s) is caught sort of between release patterns on this. Our parents were taught you get a good job at a good company and you’ll get a pension, steady raises, and loyalty will pay off. Well that doesn’t really apply anymore and I think our generation is the first to really come up in this specific environment.
So you get older people telling/trying to convince you that you need to stay at one place for stability but those career paths aren’t really so clear anymore. Hard time to come up honestly.
I made that mistake early in my tech career (live to work) and I regret it. Yes, I bust my ass every day in my current job and will do so if I stay where I am now or if I move on at some point. BUT, I am 42 and I want to “suck out all the marrow of life.” I will never cross that chasm back to the live to work side.
There is a balance, and we only get one coin to play. Might as well enjoy YOUR journey, which is different from every other human journey.
I’m about 20 years older than you guys, I think. I was told multiple times that even if you didn’t love a job, you had to stick it out for awhile because if you changed jobs or left quickly it would look so bad on your resume, you’d be hosed. That’s obviously no longer the case. To @grizzly224’s point earlier, some folks figure this out early. I met one of my best friends in 8th grade, at which point he told me he was going to be an architect. Lo and behold, he’s been doing that for years and is very successful at it and loves the work. He just knew. It bothered me growing up to be so close to someone who had figured it out and I just KNEW I didn’t have a clue. But I was lucky enough, my father was very successful in his career, but would always say, “When I figure out what I really want to do, it will be great.”
My parents generation never once considered that they’d have to LOVE what they did, or at least not hate it. It was about survival and providing support and stability, etc. I appreciate that but at some point in my career, I I jumped off the trajectory that would have for sure put a lot more money into my bank account and also for sure made me even more miserable. I truly wish I’d had the guts to stand up for what I really wanted to do when Randy did because by the time I really figured this out, I was married with a kid on the way, and that’s not the time to quit your job and take a passion job that pays literally 1/5 of what you were making if not less. Kudos to the brave ones.
Agree with this. I’m 32 and work in my in-laws’ business, when hiring new staff I have a hard time explaining to my father-in-law that people my age and younger generally aren’t taking a job with the intention to be there forever. I think the recession in 2008 really cemented this attitude for younger people. I know it did for me when I saw my dad lose the job he’d had since the early 90s and end up with a pension worth basically nothing, why would you ever be that loyal to a company when that can happen so easily?
Hate to spew things I hear Joe Rogan say but he’s always quoting Thoreau “the mass of men live lives of quiet desperation” it’s a great quote and so true. Game recognize game to all that don’t take the cookie cutter path in life.
You know just how good the episode was when the actual golf competition within the episode itself took such a massive backseat. Thinking back to last week when the brothers were battling it out and everyone was glued to their seats with the nail biting sequences of that match… then moving to this week when it just was almost a footnote within the episode. That kind of versatility is incredible to pull off but the boys do it so well.
Now to think the final will either be a battle of the Strapped boys or a grudge rematch between the brothers… man, we’re in for some excellent content and compelling storylines either way. Queue up the Bart Scott “can’t wait” gif.
I’m @greebs age, and I remember how hard it was explaining to my parents 25 years ago that I was leaving Turner Broadcasting/CNN to go take a consulting position. My parents just believed that large corporations meant stability and growth. That couldn’t be further from the truth now. Now they will burn you up in one position with no plans for growth.
My wife, btw, followed the path that @Randy bailed on. Ernst & Young (now EY), Deloitte, PWC, went with the IBM acquisition of PWC, etc…
I feel like now there are so many options. You can also stay in your job and do what @sundaybag did. Take your time outside of work to do something you love. Let your job be a net to catch you but have your ambitions after work. The only person holding you back is you. Loving this conversation
We were the first generation explaining to our parents that corporate loyalty didn’t exist anymore.