Will the Rasta man be making a return? I’ll hang up and listen
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No one loves beating @Fore20 on the golf course more than I do. Really looking forward to doing it again this weekend!
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welcome to the club
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first and foremost, i would like to thank the committee for their ultimate respect and trust bestowed upon me, which has been made very evident in their selection of me as one of the captains for such a prestigious event.
as previously mentioned, this appointment is in no way a complete shock or surprise to me, but to the contrary, this is a role that i have been preparing for since the unveiling of the details for this event.
while i will not be making guarantees of any sort regarding the outcome of this event, i will strongly suggest that anyone who is considering placing wagers of any kind know that @ColoniusFunk currently owns an undefeated record against me in head to head competitions that have taken place on a golf course.
some might take this information to mean that another @ColoniusFunk victory is imminent and the lock of the weekend, however those with any common sense at all would come to the realization that i am simply due for a W.
the immensely talented group of men & women that i will be leading into battle will be relied upon heavily to achieve what i have previously been unable to do on my own and nothing will feel better than getting to celebrate in the victory with the 29 other members of this team who will make this possible.
in closing, good luck to all the competitors at Saturdays Biscuit Bash and my apologies in advance to the haters and losers not smart enough to know that Biscuitville is the vastly superior breakfast option available who have been assigned to the other team.
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that took like 48 minutes to write
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the rasta monkey will most definitely be making an appearance and since you were so thoughtful to ask, ill save an arm for you
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Don’t make me regret missing out on those even more…
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send me your address…you can celebrate with us from afar
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it took my 47 days, clearly you missed the part where i specifically said i’ve been preparing for this since the unveiling of the event
all i had to do totday was enter @ColoniusFunk name where the template said losing captain and put some BS in there about how hes always beaten me in the past, blah blah blah
I do respect the fuck out of the fact that not a single letter is capitalized except for “Saturdays Biscuit Bash” and “Biscuitville”
Really giving the gravitas and honor an event like this deserves. Hopefully next year NBC includes this on their “Major Events calendar” along with the Majors, THE PLAYERS CHAMPIONSHIP, the Memorial Tournament, and none of the women’s tournaments
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I’m pleased that you’ve forgotten about the drubbing you doled out at Sedgefield. Just a cool 17 stroke margin of victory.
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as @Hitchings21 would agree, that fact simply doesnt fit the narrative that is looking to be achieved here…if you want to avoid a similar outcome this saturday and concede, please go ahead and submit your formal request
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hell yea, there’s literally nobody else I’d rather have as my captain!
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you suck and so do your opinions about breakfast.
ps - looking forward to our Cava dinner date thursday
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went yesterday and was strongly considering going back again today…
Cava and Biscuitville are all i’m planning to eat next week
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oo and fluff’s heart
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Its hole 16, I’ve already closed the match, I whip out an extra spicy chicken and honey just so my opponent can smell defeat…and chew with my mouth open
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Is biscuitville vs lack of taste set in stone at this point?
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