Well since you asked… it’s junior year and our team is out playing 9 after school as we normally did for practice between tournaments. These scores do not count for anything, our spots on the 1st team were decided by tournament performance. On the 3rd hole, it’s a par 4 dogleg right and it’s really tough to cut the corner but if you catch one solid, you’ll be perfectly in the fairway about 75 yards out. Since it’s a silly practice round, we all go for it but no one reaches the fairway. We are walking up to our balls, all roughly in the same 20 yard area, when our coach rolls up in his golf cart and sees us in the rough. The following exchange occurs…
Coach: “How come we are halfway through the season and no one can hit the fairway?”
/silence from everyone
Coach: “I SAID, how come we are halfway through the season and no one…”
Me, cutting him off as I know where this conversation is going: “We aren’t going to hit every fairway, every time, Coach. It doesn’t work like that.”
Coach: “Oh, is that right? Is that what you think?”
Me: “Of course. We are all going to miss fairways once in a while.”
Coach: “If that’s how you feel, you can just turn in your bag now. I don’t want players that are alright with missing fairways.”
I just stand there, dumbfounded by the entire situation. All my teammates are just staring at each other. I decided to just continue playing, thinking he’ll just drive away. I take no more than 5 steps and he drives towards me.
Coach: “No no no, you said this is how you feel. You are done playing. I’ll take you to your car and you can hand me your bag.”
So I get in the cart, he drives me back to my car in the parking lot. I dump all my shit into the trunk, give him the empty bag, and he drives away. Last I ever saw the guy.
It may be worth saying this was an old Vietnam vet who had a history of kicking guys off the team. It was very much “his way or the highway.” My sophomore year, he kicked off our senior captain, and best player, because he told the coach to stop bothering him during a tournament round. He kicked off one of the most talented kids because he couldn’t make every practice, because of club hockey commitments. Did this despite the fact they made an arrangement before the season that he could alternate between golf and hockey practice. Guy was a total nightmare to play for but because all my friends were also golfers, we still had a blast.