The Wedding Thread "what is your refund policy?"

Here’s a place for future married people to discuss wedding planning, ask questions of those who came before, and bitch about spending WAY Too Much :tm: on an open bar.

First topic of discussion, when do I start talking to my vendors about postponing my August 2020 ceremony?

uhhhh, you probably should have already started the discussion with your vendors if you are getting married in 5 months…especially in a place thats probably peak wedding season in August

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we always told folks 8-12 months out you should you have your venue and all your other vendors should be lined up like 6 months out

So we already have all the vendors, the question is how and when do we start talking to them about postponing due to COVID-19. The wedding is in VT which has been quite slow to react but now that schools there are cancelled, I imagine the vendors will be more understanding. I think the bigger question is probably, what if they refuse to push the date?

ahhh, ok…missed the postponing part my bad

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Friends getting married in May, they are going through the headache of trying to reschedule. We have 5 weddings to attend in and around New England this year, it’ll be real interesting to see how it plays out.

We booked for August 2021, thankfully.

Whatever the budget is, just go ahead and add $5k automatically. Better to be prepared.

Ended up having to call “last call” well before 11pm


leave the wedding planning to the females imo



Can’t hurt to initiate the conversation now; say that you have concerns and that you want to be proactive about rescheduling given likely issues. Ask if they have a plan yet for how to manage or if they want to work through a plan with you. If/when they push back, send them a follow-up on legal letterhead and say that your lawyer will handle future arrangements.

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Seems a little dated, is it not also my money paying for the thing?

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I’m planning my wedding (Oct 2021), so far the only headache with the current situation is cancelled venue open houses. I’m sure if we decide to book a venue (got a couple on the short list) they will have no problem taking my deposit money even if they are closed currently.

Sure it is. I dropped a lot of cash on my day. But in the end, its far more about her day than yours. Little marriage tip here, if you can learn to let her have her day and be happy at things like this, and default to the background on choices, marriage will always be smoother.

The amount of idiot mistakes made on weddings it huge. Take these words with caution.

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Supposed to be going to a wedding in a month which definitely isn’t happening at this point. Just hoping the wedding in Italy we’re supposed to go to in July is still feasible, but starting to seem more and more unlikely.

We’re scheduled for the end of October 2020. Assuming this is all over by then, but who knows. Have thought about creating this thread a couple times so I’m glad someone else did.

We just ordered our save the dates a few days ago after getting engagement pics back. I’m having to play the role of budget meister, which isn’t fun, but we’ve mostly been on the same page and knew where we wanted to splurge (photographer, band) and where we wanted to be smart with the money (food, florals (I Had to bend a bit here but we’re still reasonable - wild how expensive florals are))

Every time I had to sample this, try that, try on something,etc… was a chance I wasn’t out on the track, playing with my boys. You won’t remember much of the detail from the day, itll go by so fast, what is a big decision today won’t matter 2 days after the wedding.

Yeah, I mean, I generally agree with you but when it comes to stuff like postponing because of a pandemic, that not something I’m likely to “leave to the females.” When we were originally planning, the only think I insisted on was an open bar.

Good luck, man. August seems like we’re right in the crosshairs right now. Hopefully, October is safe.

I would get the ball rolling ASAP. My wife is a photographer & has tried getting out in front of things a bit as she travels a fair bit for destination weddings. Had 3 weddings in Italy towards the end of May already either cancel or postpone, and the rest of the year is looking decidedly uncertain also. Luckily the lead-in time has given us the chance to amend travel itineraries and mitigate some risk, but all vendors are gona be in a shaky spot right now, so I would at least test the waters to see if they have some sort of plan with regards to postponements or at least delaying payments. Given you have some time, I would hope they would at least work with you somehow. This whole thing is going to be a shitshow for a while.

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End of October here and just talked with our caterer about it.

Also tentatively going to a wedding in Ireland in August that now seems up in the air.

lmao my sister got engaged in june & was married in december last year, venue was picked in july via face time

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