Networking into private clubs

Hi - I live in an area with multiple pretty exclusive private clubs and i am pretty dead set on joining one for multiple reasons

I’ve reached out to my network to meet members, and have been lucky to have a couple of ‘introductory’ phone calls set up with members of a few of the clubs. all of these folks know that i want to join and know a little about me (professional, family) but not much else.

Curious what advice you would have on how to go from introductory meeting towards actual sponsorship at some of these notoriously hard to get into clubs? I know the cliche of ‘dont talk about membership’ etc.etc. but am stuck on how to go from a nice call to actually moving forward. I’m nervous that I’ll have a polite call, then everyone will move on with their lives and I’ll miss my shot

FWIW i believe I have a somewhat ‘attractive’ profile for the clubs to the extent that’s possible…youngish < 35, family, low single digit handicap, high paying / ‘prestigious’ career

Thanks in advance for any advice you can give. Guest round on me for the best advice if it works :wink:

Listen man, I don’t want to be the first to comment and also hurt your feelings. But if all of the above are true, then look inside for your answers.

Also, here’s a thread about private clubs you should check out:


Pretty tough to give advice not knowing the region of the country. St Louis is one of the strangest elite club cultures. They judge you by where you went to High School.



Talk to Tom Brady he’ll hook you up


Learn to sail.


Definitely not an insider here but why beat around the bush? Say you’re really keen to join the club, then get to the bs, self-aggrandizing, or butt kissing etc.

Why waste people’s time being coy?


Which ones are we talking about?

The fact that it is Boston makes it an interesting thread. Wait till you try to get a kid in Boston College. It makes Notre Dame look like a cake walk. I think Boston society is the toughest nut in the country. This is some high level shit.

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Is this a thing? BC was the only Boston school I applied to in high school and I got in with meh grades from Texas. Didn’t apply to ND but I got into some similar schools. I truly do not understand how private schools work.


set up rounds of golf with these members, even if not at their home club. offer to take them to your public track of choice or regular rounds. that’s essentially a 4 hour get to know you interview where they see your personality, etiquette and least importantly quality of play. maybe subtletly say youve played here a ton and love it but would love to be in a club. than at post round lunch or beers, ask more about joining their respective clubs.


Congrats. I bet you wrote one hell of an essay. Texas progressives weren’t always in fashion as they are now.

Just drive over to Myopia on a Wednesday morning and ask for an application. If they act surprised, tell them you’re currently on the radar at Old Sandwich. Don’t be afraid to play hardball.


It’s not totally clear if there’s one private club you’re aiming to be a member of or if you’re putting out feeler for several of the prestigious clubs. If you’re working several, I’d suggest you focus on one. That club will appreciate that you want to be a member there, rather than feeling like you just want to be a member at one of the several prestigious clubs around Boston, of which theirs happens to be one.


Seriously, is this a thing? I got into BC as well and didn’t find it to be overly strenuous.


That’s basically what I did at St Louis CC. I really miss being young and naive. I still can’t get over the time they spent with me explaining the meaning of no.


It’s not a thing at all. Getting into ND is straight up impossible. Comparing it to BC is not even close.


This BC admissions talk reminds me of another intellectual that got into a Boston school…


One of my buddies got into ND and the only reason I can possibly think of for his getting accepted there was he was being given a full ride on the track team.

Edit: Coincidentally enough he was a @sub150 800m runner, so maybe your username implies you know the world in which I used to run (bad pun fully intended)


Maybe your kids just sucked?